Wednesday, November 19, 2008


Neither infection of mine is cleared up yet, and with ST needing shoulder surgery very soon, we cancelled the weekend plans :-(

With my current fatigue level, he would have spent a third of the time sleeping, and a third of the time watching me read a book or something equally coma-like.


Just figured you might wonder why I am still so quiet! I will be hopefully perking up soon and running through the new blogs at top speed! I have visited a few. I am not mingling well with the Google Reader.

I hope everyone has a wonderful Thanksgiving!

Saturday, November 15, 2008

The same old deja vu all over again....

This was not intended to be a journal about my health and my dogs, but currently that seems to be what is going on in my life. About 2 weeks ago I realized the thrush was back. I had two separate infections - one in my mouth, the thrush, and the pseudomonas aeruginosa, on my skin. The antibiotics for the PA did not cause the thrush, since I had the thrush first. I just wasn't aware of it.

So, wanting to avoid getting to the point where I was before with the thrush (I will kindly skip the details, including the parts that made me gag), I realized I needed to see a doctor. Both my internist and my dermatologist are off on Fridays. The day I needed to be seen was - Friday. I called the internist's office and was advised I could either hope he would call in a script for me without being seen, or I could see a partner. I decided to be a Good Girl and see a partner.

Big mistake. He could not see the thrush and acted like I was nuts. He was rude to me, as if I was there to get drugs or something. I didn't ask for anything other than treatment for infections, and then some sleeping pills, since I need to use them again. He wrote me for 30, and I gave it back, saying I generally get 90 at a time. He said he couldn't give me more, so I politely returned it to him, saying I would wait until I see my internist as I pay the same co-pay for 30 as I do for 90. I left with no help from him at all, but I had to pay a co-pay for the visit. By the following Friday, I had more than visible proof of both infections, but it was after 5 pm. I was not a happy camper.

I had been getting ready to go out, and looked at my arm. I subconsciously thought, "Who bit me?" when I saw a bump on my arm. Then bells went off - I remember that same thought over the summer. Dammit, I knew the pseudomonas was back. The increased vertigo symptoms were more than enough for me to be sure, but the visual lesion just added to it. By Monday, I had probably 20 of them.

I spent the weekend counting lesions of pseudomonas and hoping for a nice juicy one that would be easy to test. I got my wish, sad to say (I still have it, almost a week into treatment). The thrush developed very fast and by Monday there was no question whatsoever. I went to my dermatologist, who seemed mystified that both had come back. Both are opportunistic infections, not likely to bother someone who doesn't have a compromised immune system. He asked me if I have a hot tub. I said no, but I had been in one a year and a half ago. No good, he said. Pool? No, I don't swim. He gave me two medications for the thrush and increased the strength of the antibiotic and increased it to two weeks, instead of one.

Had the partner of my internist only listened to me the week before, I could have avoided the two infections getting worse so very fast. I can taste them both, separately, as I told him, plus I had a definite white area on my lower lip. I was disgusted with the partner and will never see him again no matter what. His attitude downright sucked. I will mention it in detail to my regular internist next time I see him.

In the meantime, my appetite is again gone, as if I didn't lose enough weight fast enough to begin with. I have enough energy to spend about 2 hours a day doing something more strenuous than reading, and that is on a good day. I can't sleep even with a sleeping pill other than in a light sleep. I need my new sleep medication, but won't even begin testing to find out what went wrong for at least a few more weeks. There is still a question regarding the electrolyte imbalance I had that sent me to the hospital. Did the new sleep medication cause it? It's hard to tell, since suddenly so many things are out of whack.

In my disgust, I made an appointment with an infectious disease specialist. I want to know why these infections are recurring in someone who hasn't had a cold in a few decades, who can kiss someone with the flu and not get it, and who can be exposed to almost anything and suffer no effects, but has twice had two opportunistic infections. One of these, probably the pseudomonas, is causing my vertigo, I am pretty sure. It started acting up again pretty heavily when the infection returned, but the partner didn't care at all. Sure, he wasn't trying to move through a world that seems to be on LSD 24/7.

Other than that, Molly finally learned to play a game with me :-). I squeaked a toy for her, and called her to me. She came, and I acted like she won the lottery. Then I moved, and squeaked a toy. She came again - same thing. She enjoyed this as a game. It's hard to find games for a totally blind dog, but I think I finally found one.

In just a short time, I will be traveling. Let's hope my vertigo lets up a bit more so I can walk through an airport and not bounce off the walls. I just want to have a nice, long, languid weekend, with no worries about infections and vertigo. My dermatologist swears I am not contagious. I might believe him.

There has to be a silver lining, yes? Let's see. I can wear a size 4 now, for the first time in 10 years. Molly can no longer get on top of the kitchen counters to get food and risk breaking a leg. I think that is about it. Nothing else seems promising regarding my health and her eyesight getting flushed without warning. Oh yeah, and ST being 500 miles away - that is not a silver lining.

Who is going to change the batteries in my smoke alarms this Christmas? I can't even get on a ladder with vertigo. Nor can I put up a Christmas tree - Molly has no blink reflex and could easily put an eye out on a branch. I can do without a Christmas tree. I can't do without Molly.

Thursday, November 6, 2008


There is some unknown force in the universe that will not allow me to take a shower without either the phone ringing or someone coming to my door. Today I got the routine over with early - I had just taken my clothes off when the phone rang.

It was a car dealership, the one I used to deal with before the salesman became a real dick last time I went to get a new car. I was advised that they have me in their data base, but cannot find my address. I was told to give it to them.

As if that required any thought on my part. "A better idea would be if you remove me from your data base entirely. Thank you."

My shower was pleasant, after that, since I was able to complete it without any interrupting phone calls or door bells.

It has been generally pleasant here. The weather has been in the 70s, with abundant sunshine and no wind. Just lovely, but not anything we ever see in November. It is a lovely thing. I can only imagine what will suddenly follow this reprieve. We will pay. We will pay big time.

Meanwhile, I continue to encourage Molly to walk with us around the block, down the street, and any place I can get her to go. She sometimes just completely STOPS and will not move. I swear she turns into a mule. I don't force the issue, since this is about confidence building as much as exercise. If I were totally blind, I sure wouldn't want to be led around by my neck. Walking around the block can take half an hour, but it happens, several times a day. If we are lucky, we run into someone else walking and Molly just goes all gushy over everyone. Even strangers. I am chopped liver at times like that :P

Otherwise, things are returning to normal. I am feeling pretty good and getting stronger again. It's always been my pattern to heal from anything very fast, but this time I seem to be a bit slower. Law of averages, I guess.

Remo, I am Molly's white cane. Think about it. Who is more pale than I am? Red hair on top? Molly has a good thing going. I am her seeing eye person, her cane, and I pick up her poop, too. It's easy to see who is in charge, isn't it?

I cook for often for the dogs than I do for myself, but I don't have an appetite still. They never lost theirs.

Looks like time to get these poopers on the street. I hope it's not a slow, slow walk - I have a lot of things backed up to get done. I hope I don't have something broken that would mean having my electrolytes messing up on me again. My guess is that I don't.